I’m Going to Be Selfish For 21 Days…

For 21 days I am going to focus on me and my needs.  I am going to take care of me! I am going to take breaks, exercise, sleep in or wake up before everyone else, meditate, enjoy my favorite food and book and even more great things.  I am going to think about me and focus on what I need.  Sound selfish?

Well, it isn’t.

Want to know why? Because by doing this, I’m going to be able to take care of others even better.

We have this misconception in our society that tells us that taking care of ourselves is wrong.  Looking at ourselves and asking what we need is bad.  Doing something that makes us feel good is terrible.  Putting our needs first is selfish.  That right there is why we have so many miserable people on this planet.

We have this misconception in our society that tells us that taking care of ourselves is wrong. Click To Tweet

Now, I didn’t say that I wasn’t going to help other people during this 21-day challenge.  I just said that I am going to make sure my needs are met too.  I am going to do something each and every day that will make me smile.  When I’m feeling overwhelmed and stressed I’m going to take a break and do something for me, instead of pushing on and stretching myself thin.

I want to share a little back story with you.  You know, get REAL for a minute.

A few years ago, I was a young mother to 4 kids, under the age of 5.  I had newborn twins to take care of that kept me up at night, plus two other children who needed their mom. Luckily, I have an amazing husband who was such an amazing support.  He really did step in when I needed help.

But I was terrible at asking for help.  I felt like I had to do it all. I though that asking for help meant I was weak. It would mean I was failing as a mom and wife.

I also really struggled at saying no. I would say yes to anything, anyone needed.

I was stressed, overwhelmed, angry and frustrated.  I was snappy and short tempered to those I was closest to.  I wasn’t enjoying much of anything that was going on in my life. I wanted something to change but I didn’t know what could be done to help my situation.

Then I learned about Self-Care.

Self what?

Yeah…that’s what I said when I first heard the concept.  Actually, I thought that it meant having good hygiene or something. (which definitely could be included in this, but that wasn’t what it REALLY was about.)

Self-Care was a foreign concept to me.

Mom’s take breaks?

Mom’s can go have fun, without the kids and NOT feel guilty about it?

Mom’s can ask for help?


But why do we need it?

When do we do it?

How do we start this new way of life?

First, let’s start with the WHY.

Picture it. You’re this big pitcher that is full of water and you are surrounded by a bunch of other cups.  These cups symbolize your spouse, each one of your children, your job, your friends, your parents, your siblings, your church, your volunteer group, basically anyone or anything that NEEDS you.

You’re constantly getting water from your pitcher and filling their cups up.  You’re helping them and serving them. You’re getting assignments done in the knick of time.  You’re volunteering to help with one thing after the other.  Then, before you know it, you realize your cup is completely empty.  You have NOTHING left to give anyone because you forgot that you needed to keep getting your cup filled too.

When our own cup is empty, we become irritable, tired, overwhelmed, sad and all other kinds of negative emotions.  It even takes a toll on our health and relationships.  I mean, do you like being around unhappy people? No, you don’t. If you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll be that unhappy person and no one, including yourself, will want to be around you.

That is why self-care is vital.  It is the VERY first step towards filling your cup.

When do we practice self-care?


Trust me when I say that if you let one day go by, before you know it, 10 days have gone by, then 20, and so on.

Self-Care is something you must consciously decide to do, day in and day out for the rest of your life. Click To Tweet

That doesn’t mean you have to do something GRAND and AMAZING every single day. It just means you need to take time for YOU every day.  Do something that you love. Do something that inspires you.  Do something that helps you relax and recharge. It doesn’t matter how big or small it is…just do it.


Now, HOW do we go about having self-care as a daily part of our lives?

I’m glad you asked!

I have the perfect way for you to dive into self-care.

I have created a 21-day Self-Care Challenge !

Now, this challenge is a $99 value but right now you can join thus program and coach with me for just $69!

My goal is to help women learn how to better love themselves and to get clear direction on how to create an amazing life. I’ve done this same type of program with women I’ve mentored in the past and it has been a major game changer in their lives, and I know it can do the same for you.  I’ll be there to mentor you when you need it. I’ll be there to help you figure out this new way of life and I’ll be cheering you on as you go.

They say it takes 21 days to create a new habit, and that’s exactly what we are going to do.   We are going to work on self-care becoming a natural part of your daily routine.

To participate in this amazing program, click HERE.  All of the information you’ll need to get going on this new path will be sent to your inbox.

So, I’m going to be “selfish” for 21 days? (okay…actually more than that, but we’ll start with 21)

Why? Because I want to love myself, and those around me even more.  I want to be able to serve them and not feel like I’m about to break. I want to be happy and to THRIVE in this life and I know 100%, without a doubt that the next 21 days are going to make this happen.

Who’s with me?

I hope you are.

If you want more info on how you can get your self-care back on track, go check out my featured post HERE.


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6 Responses to I’m Going to Be Selfish For 21 Days…

  1. laura says:

    How much does your courses cost?

    • Charlsye Miller says:

      It’s $69 and will be available for purchase any day now. 🙂

  2. Debra says:

    Not selfish AT ALL!! The only way to stay sane is to prioritize what you NEED and make sure it tops the list. Wonderful post!

  3. Lindsey says:

    This is just awesome and something I’ve been seriously struggling with. To say I need time for myself just makes me feel guilty. But I know what you said is so true! You’re illustration about the pitcher is right on! When I get empty I’m not the wife or mom I want to be, so I need to practice self-care so I don’t get to that empty point. Thank you so much for sharing this!

    • Charlsye Miller says:

      You’re welcome! I’m glad you were able to learn from it and I hope you learn to take care of you. Always try to be a full cup! 😉

  4. Rhonda Swan says:

    Unstoppable post. Cheers to this!

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